Since finding my relationship issues stems from my parent, I started to change my status, such as attempting to considering my parent to therapy, try to talk about with my parent)

But it's challenging, I started hiding my emotion when I was a child, I fear for uncertainty than other people, I always wanna being "normal" even I know that will erode myself unique

I am easily affected by other people, so when my behavior is opposite of social Expectation, my heart feel pressured and isolated and try to find Identification from others

So I am always in dilemma of whether to do or not?
If do will change a lot but will lose something
But if not? I'll wandering in hesitation and desire

How do you think my situation?